True men

Discuss Islam basics.
Post Reply
Posts: 21
Joined: Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:15 pm

True men

Post by AbuAmin » Tue Mar 06, 2012 7:27 am

True manhood

In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Most Beneficial

All praise belong to Allah may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon his family, companions and those who follow his guidance.

Manhood is a quality that is pursued by people of high ambitions and serious thinking men. It is a basic quality that is needed by every man, for when men lose the qualities of manhood, they cease to be real men. Manhood is deeply implanted in a person through strong belief, nurtured by sound upbringing and developed by good example. A real man is one who has good and virtuous deeds to his credit, and possesses good manners and conduct.

Crediting someone with manhood sometimes means that the person possesses the characteristics which exemplify this quality, like bravery, being honest, and standing up for the truth. Allah says:"And there came a man running from the farthest end of the city. He said, 'O Moosaa (Moses)! Verily the chiefs are taking council together about you, to kill you, so escape. Truly, I am to you of those who give sincere advice." [Quran; 28:20]

Recognising the importance of real manhood in the service of Islam, the Prophet Sallallahu alayhe wa-sallam used to look out for men who could help the cause of his religion and with whom his mission could be enhanced. He would ask his Lord:"O Allah! Make Islam strong with the one who is more beloved to You of these two men: Abu Jahl or ‘Umar Ibn Al-Khattaab." The narrator commented: “And the more beloved to Him was ‘Umar.” [At-Tirmithi] The Prophet supplicated with these words looking out for those qualities of manhood that would have a positive impact upon the spread of Islam.

As a matter of fact, the acceptance of ‘Umar’s (RA) of Islam was a great event that manifested his manhood as soon as he embraced Islam.

‘Umar’s (RA) manhood was not in his physical strength nor chivalry - for there were those stronger than him among the Quraysh - but it manifested in his strength of faith; a quality that won him respect and honour. Other companions of the Prophet PBUH migrated to Al-Madeenah secretly, while ‘Umar (RA) - when he was migrating - armed himself with his sword, went to the Ka'bah, circumambulated the Ka'bah, prayed behind Maqaam Ibraaheem (Ibraaheem's station), and then announced to the Quraysh chiefs that he was migrating. He told them: ‘Whoever wants to make his mother bereaved, his children orphans and his wife a widow should follow me after this valley.’ But nobody followed him.

Real men are not judged by the size of their bodies, social status or their outward beauty- as we are led to believe from the false propogation of this in the media etc. The Prophet Sallallahu alayhe wa-sallam sent Abdullaah Ibn Mas’ood to fetch him something from the top of a tree. When he had climbed the tree, the companions of the Prophet Sallallahu alayhe wa-sallam looked at his legs and laughed at their thinness. The Prophet Sallallahu alayhe wa-sallam said:"Why are you laughing? Verily, Abdullaah's leg will be heavier on the scale on the day of resurrection than Mount Uhud”[Ahmad]

A man passed by the Prophet PBUH one day. He PBUH asked his companions:“What do you think of this man?’ They replied, ‘He deserves to be married to whomsoever he proposes, to have his intercession accepted when he intercedes and to be listened to when he speaks.’ The Prophet PBUH remained silent. Then a poor Muslim man passed by and the Prophet PBUH asked the companions: “What do you think of this man?” They replied: ‘He deserves not to be married when he proposes, nor to have his intercession accepted when he intercedes nor to be listened to when he speaks.’ The Prophet PBUH then said: “This one is as much as the fill of the Earth better than the other”[Al-Bukhaari]

Sometimes, one fervent man can equal a thousand others; indeed one man can outweigh a nation, as the saying goes: “A devoted man can revive a whole nation.” In a military campaign, Khaalid Ibn Al-Waleed (RA) surrounded Al-Heerah and requested supplies from Abu Bakr (RA) who only sent him Al-Qa’qaa’ Ibn ‘Amr At-Tameemi (RA) and said: “An army having men like Al-Qa’qaa’ will never be defeated.” When ‘Amr Ibn Al-‘Aas (RA) requested supplies from ‘Umar (RA) during the Islamic conquest of Egypt, he (‘Umar RA) wrote: “I have sent you (the equivalent of) four thousand men; four men each of whom are equal to a thousand others: Az-Zubayr Ibn Al-‘Awwaam, Al-Miqdaad Ibn ‘Amr, ‘Ubaadah Ibn As-Saamit and Maslamah Ibn Makhlad.”

SubhanAllah.... Four men equal to four thousand men! Real manhood means being thoughtful, uttering good words, having decency and resoluteness in opinion, coming out openly with the truth and displaying wisdom and courage in warning against the rejection of truth.

Manhood entails having a sense of responsibility to defend Monotheism and to give sincere advice for the sake of Allah. It means avoiding unsuitable behavior and being on one’s guard against the Difficult Day (the Day of Resurrection). A real man is sincere in his words, fulfills his promises and remains firm on the right path.

A real man is one who frequents the mosque, a man who is called to fornication by a woman of position and beauty, and yet says, ‘I fear Allah;’ a man who gives alms secretly; two men who love each other for the sake of Allah; they were brought together by their mutual love for the sake of Allah, and they parted upon the same.

A real man is truthful about pledges and fulfils them; it is also to remain steadfast upon the right path. Allah says:"Among the believers are men true to what they promised Allaah. Among them is he who has fulfilled his vow [to the death], and among them is he who awaits [his chance]. And they did not alter [the terms of their commitment] by any alteration." [Quran; 33:23]

Real manhood is expressed by exerting all efforts to reach real servitude. Allah says:"And the servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk upon the earth easily, and when the ignorant address them [harshly] they say [words of] peace. And those who spend [part of] the night to their Lord prostrating and standing [in prayer]. And those who say, “Our Lord, avert from us the punishment of Hell. Indeed, its punishment is ever adhering. Indeed, it is evil as a settlement and residence.” And [they are] those who, when they spend, do so not excessively or sparingly but are ever, between that, [justly] moderate."[Quran; 25: 63-67]

Nothing keeps real men away from worship. Allah Says:"[Such roles are] in houses [i.e., mosques] which Allah has ordered to be raised and that His name be mentioned [i.e., praised] therein; exalting Him within them in the mornings and the evenings. Men whom neither commerce nor sale distracts them from the remembrance of Allah and performance of prayer and giving of Zakaah. They fear a Day in which the hearts and eyes will [fearfully] turn about. That Allah may reward them [according to] the best of what they did and increase them from His bounty. And Allah gives provision to whom He wills without account [i.e., limit]." [Quran; 24: 36-38] Imaam Ibn Katheer said: “The word ‘men’ gives an indication that they have high ambitions, noble goals, and strong wills, with which they are able to maintain themselves in the houses of Allaah; and they favour the pleasure of Allaah over their own.”

What worse calamity can befall mankind than for its men to become effeminate, while its women adopt male mannerisms, revolting against the very nature in which Allaah created them? The Prophet PBUH:"cursed the men who behave like women and women who behave like men” [Al-Bukhaari]

When the qualities of manhood disappear among men, society falls into crisis, homes are ruined, the nation becomes weak and disgraced, and moral corruption becomes widespread. Allah Says:"Men are the protectors and the maintainers of women because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other." [Quran; 4:34]

Nations need planners and those who have determined hearts in order to fully utilise these resources. In fact the greatest of all needs is that for real men.

Real men are very rare to find, they are as rare as precious minerals and jewels. The Prophet PBUH said:“Real men are as rare as a reliable strong camel that can endure the burden of long trips; you can hardly find one in a hundred” [Al-Bukhaari]

May Allah grant us men the ability to fulfill our roles as real men of the Ummah of Islam and raise the word of Allah to make it supreme above all else which is false. Aameen.

مِّنَ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ رِجَالٌ صَدَقُوا مَا عَاهَدُوا اللَّـهَ عَلَيْهِ ۖ فَمِنْهُم مَّن قَضَىٰ نَحْبَهُ وَمِنْهُم مَّن يَنتَظِرُ ۖ وَمَا بَدَّلُوا تَبْدِيلًا

Among the believers are men who have been true to their covenant with Allah, of them some have fulfilled their obligations, and some of them are still waiting, but they have never changed in the least. (Quran 33:23)

Posts: 21
Joined: Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:15 pm

Re: Manhood in the Quran & Sunnah

Post by AbuAmin » Wed Mar 07, 2012 7:12 am

Manhood in the Quran & Sunnah

In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Most Beneficial

All praise belong to Allah may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon his family, companions and those who follow his guidance.

Qualified righteous men are the backbone of missions, the spirit for progress and the focal point of reformation. There can be countless factories of weapons and ammunition, but if there are no men to use the weapons being produced, there will be no ability to fight. The finest educational curricula can exist, but it takes real men to implement and teach them; one can create many committees to carry out a project, yet these will accomplish nothing if there are no devoted men on these committees.

Reformation and successful cultivation can only be achieved by men who experience and live it - and not merely by reading books on the subject. It is only men with zeal and devotion that accomplish projects, regardless of the number of committees that they may be members of.

A generation that possesses real manhood and righteousness can only be generated through being cultured on firm belief, strong morals and sound Islamically based customs. A generation that grows up surrounded with destructive doubts, immorality, disbelief and obscenity will never discover real manhood.

The world did not see real manhood in its finest and definitive form except in the unique generation that was nurtured by the great Prophet PBUH. That generation experienced great fear; they were not materialistic; they were not deceived or seduced by temptation; they were not scared by warnings or threats from others; nor were they proud and arrogant after victories and they would never give up after suffering setbacks.

A young boy entered into the palace of one of the Umayyid Caliphs to address him on behalf of his tribe. The Caliph said: “Let an older man come forth to represent your people!” The boy said, “O leader of the believers, if leadership was gained by virtue of age, then there would have been many others worthier than you for the Caliphate.” These are fine examples of maturity and manhood despite tenderness of age and we Muslims have had many such examples throughout history.

Building the qualities of manhood in our children.

The following are some of many Islamic points that will help develop manhood in a child’s personality insha'Allah:

-Nicknames: Calling the child Abu so and so or Umm so and so increases their sense of responsibility and makes them feel older. The Prophet used to give nicknames to children as Anas Ibn Maalik said: “The Prophet had the finest manners; and I had a brother who was called Abu ‘Umayr who was just weaned; whenever he was around the Prophet he would say: “O Abu ‘Umayr, what did the Nughayr do?”

-Taking the child to the gatherings of adults also develops manhood in their personalities. It adds richness to their understanding and improve their way of thinking. This was the practice of the companions who used to take their children to the gatherings of the Prophet .

-Relating to children historical stories, Islamic battles and heroic victories builds courage and bravery in them, which is one of the most important factors of manhood. ‘Urwah Ibn Az-Zubayr said, “Az-Zubayr Ibn Al-‘Awwaam (his father) had two children. He took one of them to some of the battles and the other would play with the battle-wounds on his father’s shoulder (when he returned).”

-Teaching children to respect elders also develops manhood in the child. Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Prophet said: “The younger ones (should) greet the elders.…”

-Respecting them in public. Sahl Ibn Sa’d said, “The Prophet was brought a cup to drink from and he had a child to his right and elders to his left. After he drank he said to the child, “Do you permit me to give this to the elders before you?”

-Teaching children manly sports like swimming, horse riding and shooting. ‘Umar ibn Al-Khattaab wrote to Abu ‘Ubaydah Ibn Al-Jarraah instructing: “Teach your children how to swim!”

-Avoiding things that would soften them up or make them resemble females, like music, dancing, wearing silk or gold and anything else that is feminine.

-Refraining from insulting them publicly, encouraging them to be participative and making them feel important.

-Greeting them with Salaam. Anas Ibn Maalik said:“The Prophet passed by a group of children and greeted them with Salaam.”[Muslim]

-Taking and valuing their opinions.

-Giving them responsibilities which are suitable for their ability and age and telling them secrets. Anas bin Maalik said:“The Prophet came to me while I was playing with other children and greeted me with Salaam, then he sent me on an errand which delayed me from getting to my mother on time. When I finally reached home, she asked: ‘What delayed you?’ I replied: ‘The Prophet sent me on an errand.’ She asked: ‘What was it?’ I replied: ‘It is a secret!’ She said, ‘Do not tell the Prophet’s secret to anyone.’” [Muslim]

-Instilling courage in them by means such as by delivering speeches.

-Attaching great importance to chastity and decency and avoiding fashionable clothes, stylish haircuts, and modern ‘mannerisms’.

-Keeping them away from luxury, laziness, unnecessary rest and idleness. ‘Umar ibn Al-Khattaab RA said:“Toughen up, luxury does not last for ever.”

-Keeping them away from sinful gatherings that involve music and other prohibitions because this contradicts manhood and integrity.
“...Mothers play a great role in building a generation. The better a mother is at raising her children, the more successfully the Ummah is built and the more successful it is at producing heroes. You hardly ever see a great man except that a great woman is behind him who left some of her traits in his personality by way of the milk from which he was fed and the warm embrace in which he sought refuge. Sheikh Abdullah Azzam
مِّنَ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ رِجَالٌ صَدَقُوا مَا عَاهَدُوا اللَّـهَ عَلَيْهِ ۖ فَمِنْهُم مَّن قَضَىٰ نَحْبَهُ وَمِنْهُم مَّن يَنتَظِرُ ۖ وَمَا بَدَّلُوا تَبْدِيلًا

Among the believers are men who have been true to their covenant with Allah, of them some have fulfilled their obligations, and some of them are still waiting, but they have never changed in the least. (Quran 33:23)

User avatar
Posts: 701
Joined: Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:28 am

Re: True men

Post by Nisa » Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:20 am

A true Man (and a true woman!!)
الْخَبِيثَاتُ لِلْخَبِيثِينَ وَالْخَبِيثُونَ لِلْخَبِيثَاتِ وَالطَّيِّبَاتُ لِلطَّيِّبِينَ وَالطَّيِّبُونَ لِلطَّيِّبَاتِ أُولَٰئِكَ مُبَرَّءُونَ مِمَّا يَقُولُونَ لَهُم مَّغْفِرَةٌ وَرِزْقٌ كَرِيمٌ

"Corrupt women are for corrupt men and corrupt men are for corrupt women, Good women are for good men and good men are for good women, such (good people) are innocent of (each and every) bad statement which they say, for them is Forgiveness, and Rizqun Karim (generous provision i.e. Paradise) " - Qur'an 24:26
كُتِبَ عَلَيْكُمُ الْقِتَالُ وَهُوَ كُرْهٌ لَّكُمْ وَعَسَىٰ أَن تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَّكُمْ وَعَسَىٰ أَن تُحِبُّوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَّكُمْ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
"Jihad (holy fighting in Allah's Cause) is ordained for you (Muslims) though you dislike it, and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know"
- Quran 2:216

Post Reply